Courageous Friends - Pt 2
By Professor Colin Smith
Reflective Reading: I Samuel 18:4-20:1
Our children should be courteous and kind towards everyone they meet. Within the giant circle of people they are acquainted with, there should be a smaller group of people they call friends. We should instruct our children that when selecting people to fill this inner circle, they should pick people whom they enjoy spending time with, share similar interests with, and most importantly, can respect. Likewise, it is also essential that they choose people who display character qualities that they wish to cultivate in themselves such as humility, kindness, honesty, courage, conviction, trustworthiness, honor, selflessness, and a good sense of humor. In the same way, they should befriend people who are free of vices like greed, dishonesty, lust, violence, gossip, hypocrisy, and arrogance.
We should teach our children to look for courageous friends. Courage is not shrinking away because something is potentially painful or unpleasant. When a brave person comes up against a hard or disagreeable task, they meet the challenge at once, with quick resolve and action, and then they are done with it. The character quality of courage is a sign of self-control and discipline. In 2 Timothy 1:7, Paul says, For God gave us a spirit, not of fear but power and love and self-control.
We learn the key to courage in Joshua 1:9, Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest. Courage comes from knowing the LORD is with us wherever we go.
In 1 Samuel 13:22, the only two people in Israel with the iron armor, sword, and spear needed to fight the Philistines were Saul and Jonathan. Saul delayed and put off the unpleasant task of fighting the Philistines. Jonathan went out to meet the task at once, saying to his armor-bearer, Come, let us go over to the garrison of these uncircumcised; it may be that the LORD will work for us. For nothing restrains the LORD for saving by many or by few. Jonathan called the Philistines "uncircumcised" because he knew the living covenant-keeping God was with His people Israel and was able to save Israel. Jonathan was courageous because he knew the LORD was with him. The result was Jonathan slaying an entire garrison of Philistines and leading Israel to victory over the Philistines at Michmash.
In 1 Samuel 17, the Philistines gathered to make war against Israel at Sochoh. The Philistine champion (a giant named Goliath) went out every day to challenge one man from Israel to come out and fight him. 1 Samuel 17:11 says that Saul was “greatly afraid.” Saul was again delaying going out and facing the unpleasant challenge before him. When David arrived at the camp of Israel and heard the news of Goliath, he said, What shall be done for the man who kills this Philistine and takes away the reproach from Israel? For who is this uncircumcised Philistine that he should defy the armies of the living God? Just like Jonathan, David refers to the Philistines as "uncircumcised" because David knows that the living covenant-keeping God is with his people Israel. Just like Jonathan, David took action immediately, appearing before Saul to volunteer to fight the giant. When Saul questioned David's ability to fight the giant in 1 Samuel 17:33, David responded, The LORD, who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear, He will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine. David, like Jonathan, was able to be courageous because he knew the LORD was with him.
After David slays the giant and leads Israel to victory against the Philistines, Jonathan notices David's courage. In 1 Samuel 18:1-4, it says, The soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his soul. Jonathan makes David his friend because he sees in David the same courage in the LORD that he has.
We should teach our children to choose friends whom they respect. Likewise, our children should choose friends who respect them. Friendship, like all other human relationships, carries with it specific duties. One of those duties is loyalty.
In 1 Samuel 20, when Saul was chasing David, David trusted Jonathan enough to go to him. Jonathan proved to be a good friend to David, someone he could trust in difficult circumstances. Jonathan did not seek the good of Saul or the interest of David, but he sought the truth, which is why he was worthy of David's trust, respect, and friendship. We should teach our children to make loyal friends who look out for their best interests even when it is not easy or safe.
David and Jonathan's friendship is a Biblical example of making friends with people who possess character qualities we respect. We should teach our children to be courageous and seek out brave friends. Proverbs 27:17 says, As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
Recommended Reading on Courage: Courage of Nikolai, Brave Heart, Basket of Flowers, The Gardener’s Apprentice
