Flattering Friends - Pt 5
By Professor Colin Smith
As parents, one of our jobs is to teach our children that there are many dangerous things in this world. Some dangerous things the Bible warns us to avoid, while others the Bible teaches us to approach with caution, wisdom, and discernment. Friendship is one of those potentially dangerous things that the Bible teaches us we are to embrace with discernment. However, the Bible clearly tells us to avoid one type of friend: the flatterer.
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy,” (Proverbs 27:6).
One of the benefits of healthy friendships is that godly friends can offer us insight and correction when we are off track. Often we can avoid making godly friends like this because we don’t like to be challenged. However, we should teach our children to embrace godly correction from friends. We should also teach our children not to consider a person their friend just because they are flattered by them.
Flattery can come in two ways. First, it can come as open praise designed to appeal to our pride and vanity. The best defense against this form of flattery is humility. Secondly, flattery can appeal to our moods, preferences, or prejudices. When a person feels wronged or mistreated, it can feel good to have someone sympathize with their anger, jealousy, vanity, and bitter disposition rather than challenge them to abandon it and pursue Christ. We should teach our children to avoid these unhealthy friendships and to instead pursue godly companions that build them up in the Lord.
As Proverbs 27:9 says, “Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel.”
Recommended Reading:
White Knights (Ages 9-14)
Ned Franks: The One-armed Sailer (Ages 12-99)
Standing with Grace (Ages 12-99)
